probably suicidal

Ah, this alone phase again… As the rainy season begins, that familiar sense of emptiness and loneliness returns. In my younger years, I found solace in the rain, unleashing my creativity through sketching people and places, followed by painting or inking my drawings. But now, it feels different—rather melancholic. I can’t help but acknowledge the clichéd nature of it all, but it somehow aligns with my current mood.

The impending return to the office feels like a burden, and I find myself dreading the days ahead. The self-loathing intensifies during my shifts and lingers as I return home to an empty house. Although I’ve grown accustomed to this solitude, feeling alone still manages to sting occasionally.

To combat the loneliness, I’ve been contemplating getting a pet. My options are either adopting a cat or waiting for my brother to potentially give me a puppy from their planned breeding. I’ve volunteered to provide a loving home for any unwanted puppies that may arise.