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December Blues

It’s already mid-December and I’m getting more unproductive as we’re reaching the end of 2021. For the past three (3) months, I’ve done nothing except watch 24/7 streams, or sleep for almost half of my day during the weekends, luckily I still have the energy to do simple chores daily, and restock my food on a bi-weekly basis.

I easily get distracted with work and always self-reflect about my performance (mostly negative thoughts), it might be burnout despite I got 5-day work off last week. The current situation also doesn’t help since there are uncertainties about my department as we’re transferring teammates so my work morale is a bit down.

It also doesn’t help that my hubby and I are countries apart and had to talk on the “best” timezone that we’re free — 15 hours apart is tough and can’t find a decent middle ground to talk.

Speaking of December, the weather is getting colder too, especially at night, and my sleep schedule is a bit unstable, I still get my “decent” six (6) hours of sleep but I don’t fall asleep at my usual time. Right now, it is 23:30 and I’m already yawning like crazy when my sleep schedule is at 3:00 — Mind you, I drank coffee two (2) hours ago.

Of course, as I’m suffering from sleep deprivation, I am also prone to migraines — horrible ones too, and can last for three days. I easily get exhausted when I encounter them too.

For now, I am trying to keep myself functioning. I have pending tasks and studying to do (new language and cryptocurrencies) but, I’m very unmotivated to do my hobby or touch my personal project. I think my journal is about 30% – 50% finished.

Also realized that reading manhwa sounds like a chore too. It sucks.

Hopefully, at the start of January, I’ll be able to get my shit together or have better habits. For now, I’m going to fluff my pillows, grab my comfiest blanket, and somehow enjoy the remaining days of December.